8/8/07 - Transvestite Surprises, Thai Police Punishments, Celebrity Barry Bonds Home Run Calls, Bobby Slayton, and Britney the Parent

Listen to all of today's segments at the K&B Archive, here.

Bobby Slayton
The Pit Bull of Comedy will be performing in Vegas, at the Hooters Casino.

8:10 - Listener Call-In: She Was a He!
In an interview, Rush Hour 3 director Brett Ratner claimed he once got a girl into bed, only to realize she was a GUY.  What would you do in that situation? For Kevin (as most guys), it was an obvious deal-breaker.  But Psycho Mike figured, well, you already spent money buying her drinks and got him/her back to your place, you might as well go through with it.  The others chastised him, with Bean likening it to going to McDonalds, ordering a hamburger, paying, taking it home, opening it up, and finding you got POO!  Mike compared it to getting a Filet O' Fish instead, appropriately.

Listeners called in with their experiences. Including one who guy who received the best oral of his life, saw his own brother be approached by the same 'girl', grew suspicious, and confirmed later that it was indeed a dude!  A transvestite also called in, saying how guys approach him all the time, then claim to have forgotten something when they hear his voice. The guys considered hooking him up with Psycho Mike.

8:45 - Ralph Character: Barry Bonds Home Run Calls
USA Today had a contest where baseball fans could create their own versions of the play-by-play for when Barry Bonds hit his record-breaking home run (which happened last night). They played some of the lamer submissions, and then played some hilarious ones created by celebrities, like Christopher Walken, Sean Connery (who swore through the whole thing), and David Hasselhoff (drunk).

9:15 - Ralph Character: Thai Police Punishments
In the news, Thai police have started a new punishment for cops found guilty of minor crimes - they are made to wear Hello Kitty arm bands.  So the boys called up their police chief, who revealed some of their new punishments for more serious crimes as well.  Like murder: living in a clown house. Or for child molestation: being made to listen to the Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald.  Sometimes they even put a tube in their eye, or make them drive around town looking for the cheapest CD!  Kevin thought those were inhumanly cruel forms of punishment.

9:30 - Alex Character: Brit Brit, Bad Parent
There have been a flurry of Britney-as-bad-parent stories lately, so the boys called her up to get to the bottom of them.  

9:40 - What It Do, Nephew?

Vermin violations at local ballparks over the last 2 years: Petco Park in San Diego: 2, Dodger Stadium: 7. Anaheim Stadium: 118!  A guy is scared to go now.   

A guy was telling people in line for the last Harry Potter its ending.  The caller told how he punched the guy in the face, took away his camera (at knife point), ran outside and threw it.  He got arrested.  Did he do the right thing? The boys thought him psychotic.  Especially for being in line for HARRY POTTER in the first place!

A worker in an unnamed restaurant told how someone sued them because he was too fat to fit through their bathroom door.  The guys were more became more concerned about guessing his restaurant. He refused, until he finally hinted that it rhymed with 'Bed Bobin.'    So cryptic!  Ralph: "Is it Shakeys?"


Tomorrow:  back-to-school gadgets, Eddie Izzard, Flea from RHCP, Loquecia, Federleezee, and..."Aks a Black".